Last night, I organized and folded all of Scout's 0-6 month clothing and packed them away in a big 30 gallon plastic tote. It made me a little sad to see and touch the tiny pajamas she wore as a newborn...tiny hats...tiny socks...

But I was also happy. I joked with DH when he walked through the room and asked what I was doing. "Putting clothes away for Scout's baby sister", I said, trying not to show my huge dorky grin. Of course, I am NOT pregnant...and we are not even close to being ready to try for another baby. But the thought of having another little girl who would someday wear those clothes made me so happy...... Another little girl, who would follow Scout around and learn from her and play with her....who would annoy her at times (I am a big sister, so I know these things) but would ultimately end up being her best playmate and best friend. Shortly after that thought, I imagined not being able to use any of those adorable clothes for the next baby because of the possibility that it might be a boy. Well, that made me smile all huge and dorky-like too!

Labels: being sappy, deep thoughts, family, ttc

Almost every year, my husband and I give eachother our Christmas presents a week....or two....or three early. When were were looking to buy our first house last October, we made an offer on the 4th house we looked at, on the first day of our house-shopping! It proved to work out just fine and the house is perfect for us, but most normal people don't buy the 4th home they look at within 20 minutes of stepping foot on the property. About a week ago, my husband who has been having some pain in his shoulders, decided he wanted to try one of those theraputic memory foam pillows. We were out with some friends late one evening and stopped at the only store around here that's open at 11:00 PM, Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart didn't have a huge selection of memory foam pillows, and I could tell that my husband would've rather held out for a better one, but his impatience got the best of him. We walked out of there with a pillow that I'm not sure he would've chosen if he had checked around at say, Target, or Kohls, or elsewhere. I know there are other examples of our hopeless impatience, but they escape me at the moment.

Oh here's one: You know how I said I was going to wait until Monday to take another pregnancy test? I know myself better than that. I took another pregnancy test first thing this morning and guess what I saw not even 3 minutes after taking dropping the pee-pee in the well?



Here are a couple pictures of the test I took this morning next to the test I took 2 days ago:





Here's what the test looked like after about 45 minutes:



I want to be excited, but I can hardly believe it! I know for a fact, though, that a pink line would not appear there in less than 3 minutes if I did not have hCG (the pregancy hormone) in my urine. I called my husband, my mom, and my sister and told them. I know a lot of people wait a while to tell their family members, but i'm extremely close to my mom and sister. They know that we're trying to conceive, and.....well, I guess that's another good example of how impatient I am!

DH doesn't quite believe it. He sort of teased me for thinking that the super faint line I saw 2 days ago was pink.....and rightly so. It was pretty ambiguous. But today's was considerably darker. My sister said she never got a test line that was as dark as the control line for 2 of her pregnancies....and she tested WAY after I did.

DH said "How do you confirm it?" and I was like "Hhhmm....I dunno...take a blood test??" But here's the thing: I'm not going to an OB/GYN for this pregnancy. I am getting my prenatal care through a midwife. The midwife I'm going to use works closely with an OB/GYN who used to be a midwife herself. All of her clients see that doctor twice during their pregnancies: once relatively early on for an evaluation and labwork, and a second time @ 28 weeks to make sure the pregnancy is "low-risk" enough to deliver naturally outside of the hospital.

Also, since my husband recently got a new job, our insurance doesn't kick in for another 90 days. That's not a problem at all, since we were planning on paying the midwife out of pocket anyway.......but it does rule out the possibility of cheaply going to the clinic we used to visit in order to see a doc there and ask for a blood test. My sis said that more than likely, they would just tell me they didn't want to see me until I'm 6 weeks along and then they'd just end up doing a urine test in their office anyway.

So, I called the midwife, told her about my tests and all the details and she told me to test again in a week - first thing NEXT Friday morning - and then call her, since I tested so early and my period was just due yesterday. She also seemed excited for me, so it's not like she didn't believe I'm pregnant, she just thinks it would be wise for a later test to confirm it. My blogger pals, Sorlil, and Danielle both suggested on my last post that I get one of those digital pregnancy tests that clearly state "Pregnant" or "Not Pregnant" on a digital screen, so I don't have to fuss with these crazy pink lines. I think that's a good idea. Maybe I'll pick one of those up for my "confirmation" test on friday. I still have one more pregnancy test in my possession. It's one of the First Response Early Result tests. I think I may continue being a crazy peeing-on-a-stick fool and take it tomorrow w/ my first morning urine. I kind of like the idea of having a photo progression of my tests where you can see the line get darker and darker as the hCG in my urine increases.

So.....I'm CAUTIOUSLY excited. I'm not going to go around telling my friends just yet. I'll wait for that.....in fact, DH has a funny plan for telling our friends at church that I'll elaborate on some other time.

Labels: midwife, pregnancy, ttc

As you can probably tell by yesterday's post, I was in a kind of a crummy mood. It doesn't help things to be negative....of course, I already knew that.....but last night at church I was reminded that words are very powerful and we can shape our lives with them. The speaker last night brought up the fact that God spoke the Universe into existence with His WORDS. John 1:1 calls Jesus the WORD. In the Garden of Eden, Satan twisted God's WORDS to deceive Eve and cause the rift between God and mankind. When faced by temptation in the wilderness, Jesus Christ resisted sin by quoting the WORD of God. Revelation 12:11 says that the brethren overcame the devil by the blood of the Lamb and the WORD of their testimonty. Proverbs 25:11 says that a WORD fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.

Really, all through the Bible there is much emphasis put on words and their power. From now on I'm going to make an extra effort to make my words positive, edifying, and in line with the Word of God.

Speaking of positive, I took another pregnancy test yesterday because I'm impatient, and I got a super faint barely-there line. I wasn't sure what to make of it. Everything I've read about HPT's says that any line, no matter how faint, means that hCG is detectable in your urine....and you only produce hCG if you're pregnant. But then, there's also something called an evap line, which is just the strip of antibodies in the test line (that would turn pink or blue or whatever the dye color is if the test is positive) becoming slightly visible as the urine evaporates from the test, when in actuality the test is negative. Most of the time evap lines are not the color of control line, rather a greyish "ghost" line or a dent in the test. I stared and stared at the whisper faint line and I'm pretty sure it's a very light shade of pink/lavendar. I know the line didn't show up right away, but I don't think it was past 10 mintutes either.

If I hadn't seen test progressions like these on the internet, I would've just called it a negative.


(tests taken from 9-14 days after ovulation)


(test taken 12 days after ovulation)

These are the same brand I took yesterday and were taken by women who were actually pregnant. I'm not sure exactly when I ovulated, but Babycenter.com's Ovulation Calculator projected that my most fertile time was between July 24th and 29th. If I ovulated on July 29th, that would make me 12 days post ovulation right now. From what I've seen, some people do get VERY faint positives when they test 11 days post ovulation.

Oh my goodness, I'm totally over-thinking this and need to just forget about it for a few days and maybe take another test after this weekend if AF doesn't show.
Oh, by the way, here's a pic of my test:



Don't strain your eyes too badly while searching for the 2nd "pink line". I swear it's there. I'm not crazy....really....I promise.

Labels: pregnancy tests, spirituality, ttc

Still no sign of Aunt Flow, although she's not really due to visit until tomorrow, according to my calculations. I had bad AF symptoms Monday, but none yesterday or today. DH thinks we probably tested too early and I might be pregnant, but I'm not so convinced. I was thinking that w/ all the pics of pregnancy test progressions I've seen, there's at least the faintest tiniest little line showing on a positive test that was taken too early. Even if you have to close one eye, look at it in bright natural daylight, and stand on one foot to see it, the line is there. The test I took was negative, without a doubt. Not even a tiny inkling of that second line showing. But then, it wasn't my first morning urine....

My aunt and uncle have tried to conceive for almost 15 years with no success. They have tried everything and have spent thousands upon thousands of dollars with nothing to show for it. Their 2nd attempt at IVF yielded twins that miscarried at 5 weeks. Now they've been going through the long and confusing process of adopting a baby girl from China for about a year and a half. They may or may not get to visit China in January or February to meet the little girl they will potentially adopt.....and even then, it could be 4 months after their initial visit before they're allowed to go back and pick her up. I can't imagine the heartbreak and frustration they've gone through. To be honest, they've both become generally bitter people with very bad attitudes about everything. In a way, I can't blame them. But it's sad that they have spent their whole marriage living for something that might happen in the future, instead of trying to enjoy the present.

I never want to be like that. I admit that thoughts of our future life with a baby are always fresh in my mind, but I love my life with my husband and the 5 1/2 years of marriage we've enjoyed. I'm happy with our life. I know it's easy for me to say right now, this being our 1st month of trying to get pregnant, but I always want to have the attitude that I DON'T NEED to be a parent to fulfill my purpose in this world. I would LOVE to be a parent and know that children are a blessing from God. The relationship between parent and child is a wonderful reflection of the relationship between the Lord and His children. As a mom, I think I'll end up being able to understand more clearly the intense unconditional love my Father in Heaven has for me. I want to keep my eyes fixed on Christ during our efforts to conceive a child and know that God wants me to live in the present day instead of wishing and hoping my life away. Amen.

Labels: ttc

DH and I decided to go ahead and take a pregnancy test last night. I know, I know....I swore I'd wait until August 13th, but with a test just sitting in my cabinet that claims it can detect pregnancy 4 days before my period's due, I just had to do it. Actually, DH was sort of the instigator. But then, it doesn't take much convincing to get me to succumb to my own raging impatience either. He was like "You should go ahead and take a te.." and before he could finish saying "test", I shouted, "OKAY!" and ran to the bathroom while frantically trying to rip the test out of its strong foil packaging. No, that's not how it really happened.

I kind of expected it to be negative. I'm not all that bummed about it though, because it was only our first month of trying. Besides, now I have a fresh month to eat super healthy, drink tons of water, and continue my prenatal vitamins and red raspberry leaf tea. I didn't do so great at eating healthy food this past month. Also, DH was under more stress than usual with his new job. I've read that stress can be a culprit in lowering sperm count and motility, so maybe that could be a factor?

Next time I really AM going to wait until I miss my period.....I SWEAR.
I'm thinking I might take a shot at charting my temperature and cervical mucus when this next cycle starts. That way, I'll have better idea of when I actually ovulate.

Labels: pregnancy tests, ttc

I am on day 23 of my current cycle. My "visitor" is due in 9 days, on August 10th. I don't much like this waiting game and hope that we are either pregnant right now or we will be within the next couple cycles. It's so easy to trick myself into thinking I have early pregnancy signs. I'm probably just extremely aware of every little thing my body does. If my stomach gurgles or my breasts are tender, I notice it. If I pee twice during the night instead of once, I notice it. If I'm extremely emotional...ahem, see my last post...I notice it and count it as a signal that I may be preggy. Reading things like the "Early Pregnancy Symptoms" on Two Week Wait helps my mind play tricks on me. Some of the common symptoms listed that (I think) I have experienced are:

strong smelling urine

"pinchy" feeling not-quite menstrual cramps

"prickly" feeling in nipples

nausea

I'm sure that I'm just being crazy and it's probably way too early to experience pregnancy symptoms anyway. All those things may happen to my body around this time every month, but I've never had a reason to pay attention. I'll be glad when August 10th comes and goes with no sign of "Aunt Flow" and I start feeling really puky.

My mom said she had a dream that someone handed her a naked newborn little boy. She says that she dreams the sex of the unborn babies in our family all the time. If I remember correctly, she has been pretty right on with most of the babies she's dreamed about. But I'm really not putting too much stock in that. I'd be ecstatic with either a boy OR a girl. I want it to be a surprise, but I can imagine that it will be very difficult to not break down and want to know when I'm far enough along to find out. DH and I are the kind of people that give eachother our Christmas presents a week before Christmas. I know, it's awful.

When my friend dropped off the little guy I babysit this morning, I thought I had no diapers. That woudn't normally be a problem, but DH took my car to work because it is more comfortable than his truck and he's got a pinched nerve in his shoulder. His truck is here, but I'm a silly timid idiot and don't know how to drive a standard shift vehicle. For a moment, I thought I would have to take a crack at using cloth diapers for the first time and it kind of scared me! Well, I'm not sure that the sizes I have made and bought would fit this chunky 30 lb baby anyway, but even if they did.....I'm ashamed to say that I might be too selfish to let another baby poop in the diapers that I've carefully collected for my own baby. Just as I was about to get dressed, put the baby in the stroller, and walk to the grocery store to buy some disposables, I noticed the tied-up Wal-mart sack in the foyer next to his carseat with a week's work of diapers inside. Whew! Good thing, because I had just realized that baby's stroller is in the trunk of my car. Looks like I can save my pristinely clean and new cloth diapers for my own little one to have explosive diarrhea in.

Labels: babysitting, cloth diapering, ttc

I've come to find and interesting phenomenon that I had no clue even existed until DH and I began this journey of trying to make a baby.

I have learned that there is an entire subculture of women out there who are obsessed with peeing on sticks. Yes, it may seem to be a very unlikely addiction, but I assure you, there are MANY out there who HAVE to pee on a stick on a very regular basis or they will start having the shakes and cold sweats.

Okay, that last bit was a slight exaggeration, but just visit peeonastick.com or twoweekwait.com and you will see what I mean.

The funny thing is, I can totally see myself acquiring this strange uncontrollable need to pee on a stick. You see, when a couple is trying to conceive a baby, the woman experiences a small window of fertility each month that, if missed, means waiting until next month to try again. Some women use Ovulation Prediction Kits (or OPK's)in an attempt to find out when that window of opportunity is happening. OPK's are generally strips that you pee on every day (or even multiple times a day)during the time of your cycle that you are likely to ovulate. If the line is as dark as or darker than the control line, you can probably expect to ovulate within the next 24-36 hours.

After ovulation, the woman faces the dreaded "two week wait", when she is forced to wonder and obsess: "Am I pregnant? Am I not? What the crap is going on here??!!" That's why many women simply cannot wait until they miss their periods to take a pregnancy test. Some test as early as 7 days post-ovulation, hoping to see that little faint line that says "Congratulations! Your body has little bit of the pregnancy hormone HCG!"

On twoweekwait.com you can look at numerous photos like these:



The above is a progression of pregnancy tests beginning at 12 day post-ovulation. It's pretty cool to see how the line gets darker and darker.....but it would also be pretty nerve-racking to test everyday and never see a line.

I made a promise to DH that I would wait until I have most definitely missed my period to test so I don't put us through the agony of testing every single day, hoping for that line to appear/get darker.
My period is due August 10th. I figure if she doesn't show up, I will wait until August 13th to test....ya know, just to make it lucky ;)

I certainly don't think that women who are obsessed with peeing on a stick are crazy. I am the queen of impatience. If left to my own devices, I would probably join their ranks and pee right along with them.

Is it August 13th yet??

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
An update on my food-intake:
Sorry, I kind of lost track of what I was eating there for a few days. After this weekend, I have definitely been eating healthier, although I did have a bowl of Neapolitan ice cream w/ mini-marshmallows on top (I just need to throw that dang bag of marshmallows away!) the other night.

Today:

BREAKFAST:
1 small bowl of corn flakes w/ a cut up banana and a splash of skim milk
1 handful peanuts

Lunch:
1/2 cup cottage cheese w/ a couple pecans and a squirt of honey
1 apple
3 eggwhites / 1 egg yolk cooked in a smidge of olive oil

Dinner:
big bowl of mixed veggies w/ parmesan cheese
1/2 cup brown rice

Snack:
Handful mini-marshmallows (I just can't throw perfectly good food away, even if it is the devil!)

Labels: food, ttc

Well, I took my Ovulation Scope back to Wal-Mart from whence it came. I actually feel sort of bad for doing this, because I am the one who essentially broke it.

I must say though, that the thing was extremely cheaply made. As soon as I took it out of its package I felt disappointed that I spent $15 dollars on a really small flimsy piece of plastic that seemed as if the whole thing would just crack into pieces if you twist the lens off with a little brute force.

Its apparent poor quality wouldn't have bothered me one bit if it were meant to be a one-time-use kind of test, but the directions boast that you can use it month after month for as long as you like. That was actually the whole reason I bought it.

As I was rinsing the slide off w/ water, as the directions advise, I noticed that there was fuzz or a smugde of sorts on the lens. So I decided to rinse the lens off as well. I dried the pieces with a dry Q-tip and set them on the counter to air out. When I came back, I noticed that there was a big bubble obstructing the view through the lens. Apparently when I rinsed the lens, water had gotten in between the two lens-pieces, which rendered the whole thing useless since it was now impossible to see the saliva through the scope. Doh!

When I took it back, I didn't lie, but I didn't give ALL of the information. I told the girl that there is a bubble in the plastic lens that makes it so you can't see through the scope. She didn't even ask me if I had already used it. She took it back with no questions. Wal-Mart's return policy is unbeatable. One time, I took back a blatantly-opened package of Hanes Her Way undies because they didn't fit. No questionas asked. You gotta wonder what happens to all that already-opened (possibly used???) underwear that people bring back. Do they re-shelf it?? I shudder to think.



You could be wearing my underwear right now.

I used the $15 dollars to put a tiny bit of gas in my car and buy some Jell-O to make for the "Couple's Night" thing that our church is having tomorrow night. Boy, that's just great. I used ill-gotten money to buy refreshments for a church function. Shame.

I wonder if anyone at church notices that everytime there is a potluck function I bring some sort of Jell-O.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Breakfast:
1 cup unsweetend generic Cheeri-os
1/2 cup skim milk

Lunch:
5 bites of leftover chili
An egg sandwich made w/ 1 yolk, 3 whites, 2 pcs wheat toast, 1/8 cup shredded cheddar cheese (might as well face it I'm addicted to cheese), and a squirt of lo-carb ketchup (has Sucralose in it. Doh!)
1 apple

Snack:
20 or so mini-marshmallows

Dinner:
A turkey reuben (2 pcs wheat bread, 5 slices turkey lunch meat, a bunch of saurkraut, and you guessed it....1/8 cup of CHEESE! Oh, and a squirt of dijon mustard)
No veggies....SHAME ON ME!!!



I ended up drinking 8 oz of coffee, but still had a splitting headache until I went to bed. I'm prepared for another headache today. I'm going to drink 4 oz of coffee and I know that won't be enough keep my head from pounding. Note to self: Don't get all jacked up on caffeinne during the weeks leading up to trying to conceive. You knew you were gonna have to quit! Why did you do that???!!! Gggrrrr.

Labels: product reviews, ttc

I bought an Ovulation Scope today, which is supposed to aid in predicting ovulation. I wasn't going to get all psycho-crazy and buy those super-duper fertility pack deals that include a ba-jillion ovulation test strips and a 15-pack of pregnancy tests, but my enthusiasm and impatience got the best of me and I decided it wouldn't hurt just to buy one conception tool.

The Ovulation Scope seemed to be an economical way to test my fertility as opposed to the pee-pee tests. At Wal-Mart, 7 urine test strips were at the very minimum $11.97. So if we took say, 4 months to conceive, that would be $47.88 spent on pee-pee tests. I'm hoping it won't take that long.....that would be horrible.....doomed to have sex all the time like bunny rabbits for the next 4 months! How awful! Totally kidding.



'Twas $15.

I just tested my saliva. From what I can tell, I'm not ovulating. You put a little saliva on this clear slide and then view it through a cheap plastic microscope lense after it has dried. If you see a bunch of scattered bubble-like dots, you are not fertile. If you see a "ferning" pattern, much like the shape of ice crystals, you are fertile. I just saw bubbly-looking things, so if I did it right, I am apparently not ovulating at the moment.



Mine definitely looked like the first one.

DH made a good point a while back: "Instead of testing fertility, why don't people just have sex every single day when they're trying to get pregnant?"

"Hhhmmm....", I thought.

So up until now, that was our plan of attack. I posed the same question to my sister today and she pointed out that if the man sort of...um..."saves up" his sperm for a little bit before the woman's fertile time, he will have a higher sperm count than if he were constantly releasing sperm up until that point. Makes sense to me.

Sorry, DH, looks like your all-sex, all the time strategy might not work.

That said, I certainly don't plan on being abstinent throughout the entire non-fertile time leading up to ovulation. That would just be crazy. Sis said that some suggest to do-it every other day throughout your projected fertile time.

I feel like I'm overthinking this whole thing. I'm sure it doesn't have to be this complicated. After all, I bet if I were a teenager getting busy with my boyfriend in the back of a car, I'd get pregnant in a snap.

Labels: ttc

Warning: This post may include what some would deem "TMI". However, since this weblog IS called "Making a Person", it would be silly not to include this little detail in our journey leading up to parenthood:

WE ARE OFFICIALLY TRYING TO CONCEIVE.

Actually, we haven't really...ahem...uh..."started" trying to conceive yet, as AF just ended and I will not ovulate until around July 25th/29th-ish. I will assume you're a smart little cookie and can make an educated guess on what AF stands for.

So, unless DH decides it would be better to wait until my end-of-August ovulation for whatever reason, looks like we will no longer be taking preventative measures whilst engaging in......der....um....the marital act.



I definitely believe that God created sex for more than just the purpose of procreation. It is an awesome display of the love and covenant between husband and wife. With that said, I am also looking forward to the freedom and excitement of having sex for the purpose of procreation......that will be something I've never experienced before. And then there's a whole 9 months of prevention-free sex to enjoy after that!

My mom and step-dad are coming to visit at the end of September and it would be nice to know for sure if I'm pregnant or not before then. If we wait until my ovulation time in August to start trying, I would be expecting to get or miss AF while they are here visiting. I'd rather be several weeks pregnant by then and able to tell them for sure that they are going to have another grandchild (via my womb this time and not my sister's. (bless her fertile little heart) hee hee :)

You all must be thinking I'm being overly optimistic in expecting that DH and I are going to get pregnant our first go-round. Eh, maybe I am.....but I just have this strong gut feeling that we are not going to have any trouble at all trying to conceive. On the other hand, if it does take a few months, I certainly won't be heartbroken. It will just mean that God hates me and wants me to be a giant preggo cow in the midst of the South's hellishly steamy summertime heat. Totally joking.

God loves me.

Labels: family, sex, ttc

DH officially has a job! He starts Monday at a company that prints tickets for national sporting events and concerts. He will be one of their database nerds. There is no dress code, which he is absolutely stoked about. If he had his way, he would wear holey pit-stained t-shirts and polyester pants from the Salvation Army to work everyday. He will be making $4k less per year than at his old job, but I think the pay cut is worth it for him to be able to work in less "corporate america" type environment.

Baby-making kick-off is scheduled for the end of August. Woo hoo! After years of trying to prevent pregnancy, it'll be pretty refreshing to just let nature take its course. I am so thankful to the Lord for this time in our lives. He has entrusted DH and I with making a human being. We will shape this child's world. His/her perception of who God is will largely rely on how he/she perceives us. We must comfort and chastise. We must provide boundaries as well as freedom. We must love and protect unconditionally and instill wisdom from God's Word. What a mind-blowing responsibility! Yet, I am not worried or scared....only excited and in awe of God's design of the family unit and how it reflects His relationship with us.

I just want to pause right here and say that the Lord - Yahweh - is so infinitely good to me! His Son Y'shua (Jesus' Hebrew name) died so that I may have life filled with God's peace and joy. He is my supreme example of what a human being should be: overflowing with love and compassion for others, filled with a burning desire to know the heart of the Father. Father God, please help DH and I to be the parents you want us to be.

Okay, here's where the entry turns from heart-felt and serious to materialistic and shallow :)

In honor of DH getting a job, I have created a small wish-list of baby things I would like to accumulate over the next 10 months. Actually, these are all crazy frivolous things that are way out of our price range and I would never buy. But, boy are they fun to covet!

1. The Bugaboo Cameleon Stroller
Price: $879.00



2. Mozzee Nest Highchair
Price: $575.00



3. Britax Marathon Carseat
Price: $269.99


4. Modern Tots Alex Dresser/Changing Table
Price: $1,195.00

Labels: baby gear, dh, spirituality, ttc

So, it's the end of June and we're going to start trying to have a baby in August. Assuming that we get pregnant right away, I have a little more than a good solid month of trying to eat right, taking my vitamins, and exercizing before actually being pregnant.

Sadly, the last week or so I've been eating pretty unhealthily. At a recent church function I brought some lime Jell-o concoction I made with pineapples, marachino cherries, cream cheese, whipped cream, colored marshmallows, and walnuts. I know it sounds like something out of a 60's cookbook, sharing a page with the weird tuna aspic and radio active-looking swedish meatballs, but I love it for some reason. I usually make something similar for every potluck I go to. Most of it got eaten, but I ended up bringing the last 4-5 servings home and ate it all by myself within 2 days! Guess DH is not a big fan of green Jell-o chock full o' sweet junk.

Every Friday, our church has a barbeque on the new church property to celebrate the beginning of its construction. And every Friday it's hamburgers and hotdogs.....deliciously burnt with smoky grill lines. Yum. How can I turn that down? I think I've gained 5 lbs in the last couple weeks. Not good.

The midwife that I would like to have for my prenatal care as well as the birth is an expert in nutrition and told me that she is very strict and pushy when it comes to making sure the women she works with are eating a natural and healthy diet. UUuughh. Maybe I won't tell her about this little binge I've been on. She is a vegan herself, but I don't think she necessarily forces that lifestyle choice on her clients. She does encourage a diet full of unprocessed foods free of pork and red meat - lots of fruits, veggies, natural grains, and herbal supplements.

Okay, just one more weekend of this junk and then I'll eat healthy from then on....I promise.

Back to the weird retro gelatin salads....here's one for you:

EGGS IN ASPIC





HERE'S ANOTHER ONE I DON'T HAVE A PIC FOR:

Heavenly Cheese Mold

INGREDIENTS:
13 oz. can crushed pineapple
3 oz. pkg. lemon jello
1 cup boiling water
1 Tbsp. lemon juice
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 cup heavy whipping cream
PREPARATION:
Drain pineapple, reserving juice. Add enough water to pineapple juice to make 3/4 cup, if necessary. In large bowl, place jello and add boiling water. Stir until gelatin is completely dissolved. Add pineapple liquid and stir. Chill in refrigerator until slightly thickened. Fold in pineapple and shredded cheese.
Whip cream in medium bowl until stiff. Fold into gelatin mixture. Pour into 1-1/2 quart mold, cover, and chill until firm. 8 servings

Recipe from busycooks.about.com

Somehow, I never imagined lemon Jell-o paired with cheddar cheese.....but what do I know?

Labels: food, health, recipes, ttc

This past week has been a rollercoaster of strange thoughts and emotions. DH quit his job suddenly in a fit of rage over the unfair way they have been treating him. Monday afternoon he was so angry, he packed up all of his belongings and brought them home. He took Tueday off because he was still not quite cooled off. Tuesday night afterhours, he left a letter of resignation on his boss' desk, along w/ his keys and his laptop. The resignation was effetctive immediately. Wednesday was a barrage of calls from his superiors and co-workers, none of which he answered.

We discussed all of our options before he quit and decided that he has enough skills to go into business for himself. We both felt empowered and confident in this decision, but as the week went on, DH started having 2nd thought. He contacted his immediate supervisor on Friday and he's supposed to go in on Monday to talk with the supervisor's boss. He's pretty sure he's just going to go back and work for them.

In a way, it's a little sad, but I have to admit that I do feel better knowing that we will have stability in these months of planning to have a child. DH has been so adamant about planning financially for the arrival of a baby - it would be very ironic if our baby came into the world with a couple of jobless parents.



P.S. - I think I ovulated the other day, according to the consistency of my cervical mucus, which means I must ovulate on the 14th day of my cycle or so. When it comes time to try, I think I'll get one of those ovulation detection kits from Wal-mart or somewhere. A lady recently told me that she and her DH had been trying to conceive for 7 months and after she got the ovulation kit she realized she was ovulating 4 days earlier than originally thought and ended up getting preggo right away.

Heehee... the term "preggo" makes me giggle. It reminds me of Britney Spears or another pregnant celeb....I guess because smut magazines always use headline such as "Madonna's Preggo" or the like. How silly.

Labels: dh, finances, ttc

The purpose of this weblog:

• To keep record of the events leading up to the birth of my yet-to-be-conceived child.
• To keep record of the events that take place during the birth of the child. I want to write a detailed account of the entire laboring process from start to finish. Hopefully, I'll be able to make a few posts while in early labor to give up-to-the-minute updates on what's happening with my soon-to-errupt body and how I'm coping with my surroundings.
• To keep record of the events immediately following the birth of the child until I am forced to quit wasting time blogging my life as a new parent because there are too many gum-in-the-hair, riding-the-dog-like-it's-a-pony, "Mom, Billy's bleeding" incidences while I'm sitting @ my computer.
• To amuse myself with my own poorly drawn illustrations.

My initial inclination was to write each post as if I were addressing the little unconceived person in a letter, but let's face it, there's something sort of creepy about a grown adult writing letters to a person that has not been born. Well, okay, that in of itself is not so creepy, but writing to a person that has not even made its home in a womb yet is pretty...um....odd.

But in a way, this pregancy (which is not even a pregnancy yet) started when the idea of a child in our lives was conceived.

My husband and I have been married for 5 years and 6 months. A few months ago, when we were driving home from a trip up North to visit my family, we stopped at a Burger King in a travel plaza. I'm sure if I thought really hard, I could come up with the name of the highway and which state we were in, but I don't feel like it right now. Maybe I'll research it and add that later for sentimental purposes.

DH and I don't eat at Burger King very often. I am a little overweight and have cut junk food out of my diet, barring the occasional lapse when I totally blow it and eat deep-fried Snickers wrapped in bacon every meal for an entire weekend. During our two week trip visiting my family, I ate like I was in a race to see how much partially hydrogenated soybean oil I could get coursing through my veins at any given moment. Up until that point, I had gone from 213 lbs to 172 lbs over a period of several months of eating a healthy diet and exercising in a very half-assed kind of way. DH and I both knew that this sugar-capade we had been on was about to come to a close as we entered our real lives (why do I think that travel gives me the license to suddenly go nuts and drown my food in chocolate and gravy??). So, we thought that scarffing a Whopper was the logical thing to do before having to face reality. NOTE: DH is awesome and is eating healthy with me, despite the fact that he is very trim and does not need to lose any weight at all. What a trooper.

As we sat our trays down at the dirty booth and began to eat this horribly delightful meal, DH asked me what my goal weight was and if I thought I could achieve it by the end of the Summer. At that particular moment, for reasons that are obvious, I didn't really want to think about my weight-loss goals. But the reason why he was asking me right then was not to pressure me or make me feel guilty, but because he knew in the past I had said that I'd like to get down to my "ideal weight" before I ever even think about getting pregnant.

He did the math on how many pounds a month I would have to lose in order to reach the goal by the end of August and surprisingly finished his sentence with "because I think it would be cool to have an April baby".

I was totally floored because he has always been reluctant about the idea of having kids. I mean, I thought it would be something that would happen in the very distant future, but honestly it didn't look like Matt was going to warm up to the prospect of a baby any time soon.

I was ecstatic, to say the least. A few days earlier, when I wasn't around, he told my sister about his plans to tell me that he is ready to start planning for a baby. She has 3 kids of her own and I have mentioned to her my desire to have kids as well as DH's reluctance, so she knew what huge news this would be for me. DH said that his change of heart came with the thought that I had supported him in all his endeavors....... like the time he quit his job and became a full-time professional musician with a relatively successful Christian rock band that toured over 200 days out of each year, I was right on board with him wanting him to achieve his dream. He realized that maybe my dream is to be a mom, and he'd like to support me in that dream the way I supported his dream of being a professional musician.

At this point, I must digress and break my own rule of not "talking" to the yet-to-be-conceived child at this moment and say:

Little Person, this was the moment your Dad and I decided that we wanted you to be in our family. Sitting in that icky Burger King booth at a travel plaza somewhere along our travels, the IDEA of you was conceived, and we started making plans to bring you into this world.

Labels: being sappy, dh, ttc