I'm too pregnant to go to church tomorrow.....
Saturday, April 07, 2007
This is going to sound a lot more gripey and mean-spirited than I intend for it to, but I must say that I am so TIRED of some of the dumb comments people make. I want to hide and skip church tomorrow because I just don't feel like hearing it.
"You haven't popped that baby out yet?" Why, yes....yes I have, but I decided to stuff a basketball up my shirt and leave the baby at home. Alone.
"Are you getting nervous?" Okay, I can understand the "Are you getting excited?" comments. (even though that's sort of a silly question too)....but c'mon, "Are you getting nervous?" DH is the master of sarcasm, so it's tempting for me to want to reply, "Yes. I am petrified. I have no faith at all that this birth is going to go smoothly. If there's one thing I've learned from Christ's teachings is that worry and fear helps. I am nervous. Oh. My. Gosh....am I NERVOUS!!!!!!!" (and then break down in tears, curl up in a ball in the corner, and rock back and forth maniacally)
"Have you dilated any?" Besides the fact that I think it's weird for people to ask about the condition of one's cervix (especially if I don't know the person all that well), I find the question annoying because I then have to tell them that I don't know because I don't get internal checks. They inevitably ask why, so I have to go into this spiel about how my midwife doesn't feel they are beneficial or necessary until labor because they pose too much risk of infection and offer too little information, and even during labor she will ASK me whether or not I want her to check my cervix. People just look at me like I'm nuts when I tell them that. Sheesh. I'm not the one who just asked you if the inside of your hoo-ha is opening up!
"Have you picked a name?" This is an innocent enough question, but sometimes when I reply that we have but that we're keeping the name a secret until after the baby is born, the person seems a little irritated with me.....like they're hurt or insulted because I won't tell them. What DH and I SHOULD have done is come up with pretend names to tell everyone just to appease them, but use the real name we chose instead.
"I bet you're just miserable!" My knee-jerk response to this one would be similar to the one about being "nervous"......That's just great - a faith filled brother or sister in the Lord assuming that I am feeling awful and that my body is riddled with pain, discomfort, and agony. I always set people straight by declaring how wonderful and energetic I feel.
I know there are plenty more, but I'm sleepy. If you think of any frequently-heard insensitive pregnancy remarks that have personally rubbed you the wrong way, feel free to comment. Commiserate with me. Let's all gripe together :)
"You haven't popped that baby out yet?" Why, yes....yes I have, but I decided to stuff a basketball up my shirt and leave the baby at home. Alone.
"Are you getting nervous?" Okay, I can understand the "Are you getting excited?" comments. (even though that's sort of a silly question too)....but c'mon, "Are you getting nervous?" DH is the master of sarcasm, so it's tempting for me to want to reply, "Yes. I am petrified. I have no faith at all that this birth is going to go smoothly. If there's one thing I've learned from Christ's teachings is that worry and fear helps. I am nervous. Oh. My. Gosh....am I NERVOUS!!!!!!!" (and then break down in tears, curl up in a ball in the corner, and rock back and forth maniacally)
"Have you dilated any?" Besides the fact that I think it's weird for people to ask about the condition of one's cervix (especially if I don't know the person all that well), I find the question annoying because I then have to tell them that I don't know because I don't get internal checks. They inevitably ask why, so I have to go into this spiel about how my midwife doesn't feel they are beneficial or necessary until labor because they pose too much risk of infection and offer too little information, and even during labor she will ASK me whether or not I want her to check my cervix. People just look at me like I'm nuts when I tell them that. Sheesh. I'm not the one who just asked you if the inside of your hoo-ha is opening up!
"Have you picked a name?" This is an innocent enough question, but sometimes when I reply that we have but that we're keeping the name a secret until after the baby is born, the person seems a little irritated with me.....like they're hurt or insulted because I won't tell them. What DH and I SHOULD have done is come up with pretend names to tell everyone just to appease them, but use the real name we chose instead.
"I bet you're just miserable!" My knee-jerk response to this one would be similar to the one about being "nervous"......That's just great - a faith filled brother or sister in the Lord assuming that I am feeling awful and that my body is riddled with pain, discomfort, and agony. I always set people straight by declaring how wonderful and energetic I feel.
I know there are plenty more, but I'm sleepy. If you think of any frequently-heard insensitive pregnancy remarks that have personally rubbed you the wrong way, feel free to comment. Commiserate with me. Let's all gripe together :)
Labels: pregnancy whining
posted by Unkempt Mommy at 10:05 PM
6 Comments:
Oh my gosh I have been dreading church tomorrow for the same reason(s). This past Tuesday I worked in the childcare and I got so many "We didn't expect you to be here this week" and "How's your cervix" and "Oh you're still pregnant" comments that I thought I would lose my mind. My mom says to be glad people care and/or are interested. I say LEAVE ME ALONE, I'M CRABBY AND PREGNANT!
Oh, and you forgot "How are you feeling?"
How do you think I'm feeling?
Happy Easter!! hee hee
You forgot the one about how you look big enough to be carrying twins! That way you can remind them that you haven't had any ultrasounds, but that you're pretty sure that there's only one. Bless your heart. You must be...enjoying every last minute of feeling little baby moving around in there because you're going to miss it when it's over. Enjoy it while you can!!
Oh yeah - I do keep hearing the "twins" comments. GGGggrrrrr....I didn't skip church today (LOL :) and I got the whole "Are you sure it's not twins" thing at least 4 times. Gosh.
Usually when a couple has a baby at our church, they post a pic of the baby along w/ date/time/weight details on the projector screen soon after he/she is born and show it during Sunday morning announcements. I think I'm going to have DH do some quick photoshop editing to create a pic of 2 identical babies to post on the screen at church and play it off like we did have twins. DH also wants to photoshop-in the faces of Wolverine and that one dude from Kentucky Headhunters onto the babies bodies.......because DH has big sideburns and everyone thinks they're so clever by saying (over and over), "Ha ha, wouldn't it be funny if the baby came out with sideburns??"
Ha ha ha ha! A baby with sideburns...yeah, that's funny! Not! I would reply, "Yeah, that's my idea of funny. My baby coming out with trimmed facial hair!"
I know people are just joking around and ultimately I don't get that pissed off about stuff, but the sick side of me wants to make them feel bad with some quick witty reply! I am so thankful the Lord loves me inspite of myself! It sounds like you and I are a lot alike.
My fake name is "Tuna," for a boy or a girl. It shuts people up pretty fast, though I have a hard time keeping a straight face when I share that. "We also think it would be a lovely middle name.. Chunklight Tuna..."
I'm at www.devriesthree.blogspot.com
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