I'm like a little kid @ Christmas.....I woke up at 5:30am and couldn't go back to sleep because this is the day my parents get here!!! I got out of bed at 6:30, took a shower and got dressed, and now I'm about to go to the grocery store to pick up some stuff for us to make dinner this week. My mom loves coffee, but it has to have fancy flavored creamer, so I have to pick up some of that. I don't think they like crazy hippy health-food type stuff, so I bet they won't like the cereal and other food we already have in our cupboards....so it's off to buy some "traditional" super processed ingredients :)

It is storming here and I'm really hoping it dries up soon because our church is having a Bike Rally (as in, motorcycles) today and it is supposed to be outdoors. There will be a bike show, a swap meet, a greased pig race (yep - they are greasing a little 15lb pig and letting people try to catch it for a prize!), lots of delicious southern barbeque, a Krispie Kreme Doughnut sale, and like 5 or 6 heavy metal bands playing on a big stage made up of a bunch of flat-bed trailers. I really want to go to it, but my parents will be here around 11 or 12 and I still have cleaning and stuff to do.....and I don't think my parents are fans of heavy metal, so I bet they won't want to go to the festivities :) We might go down there to eat some barbeque if they're not too tired, though.

Labels: church, family

I should take a few pics of my house. It's the cleanest it's been in quite a while. Well, I'm not quite done yet - still have to finish the kitchen and our little entryway area, but everything else is just about done.

My mom and step-dad are coming in on Saturday and I don't want them to have to spend their relaxing vacation surrounded with clutter and dog hair.....although their Australian Shepherd sheds quite a bit, so they're used to the dog hair. They are leaving tomorrow morning at about 9:00am (their time), then they'll stay the night somewhere a little over 10 hours into the drive. They'll get up Saturday morning to finish their journey, which will probably take about 5 or 6 hours. They've never seen our house or met any of our friends, since it's been 4 years since my mom has been here. I'M EXCITED!!!!!

Labels: family, household chores

Yesterday was our 2nd prenatal appointment. I am at 10 weeks and 3 days today. Everything went great! We opted NOT to try and hear the heartbeat with the Doppler because I really want to limit baby's exposure to ultrasonic waves. I know most of the studies out there on the negative effects of ultrasounds on human fetuses are relatively inconclusive, but I've read a few of them that were enough to make me feel very cautious. When I voiced my concern to the midwife, she seemed glad that I had done my research and told me that she has also been reading up on the subject and has the same concerns. I was glad that she didn't think I was just being unnecessarily paranoid. She said we'd probably be able to hear the heartbeat at around 16-20 weeks with a fetoscope, and I am totally fine with that. She will, however, use the Doppler during labor because it is almost impossible to use the fetoscope effectively when momma is in the tub or in strange labor positions on land. I'm totally fine with that as well. So, barring some unforseen circumstance, this little one will have only been exposed to the Doppler twice and have had no sonograms. I feel really comfortable with this decision.

My iron went back up, so the midwife was very pleased with that. I've only gained about 3 lbs since my last visit and that seemed to make her happy as well. She and her 2 apprentices tried to measure my uterus, but said the top of it is probably still right below or just peeking up over the public bone, so it was too difficult to measure. She checked my urine for protein and other levels and everything was good. My appointment with my back-up doctor is next month, October 17th. I suspect I'll get some lab drawn at that point, but not sure what else will be done.

I wish I had more to report. It is a lttle disappointing not to be able to have any concrete "proof" of the little one, but I know in my heart that he or she is growing beautifully and everything is a-okay. Women back in the day didn't have the technology to see and hear their babies this early on, and yet somehow, the human race survived. :)

Labels: midwife, pregnancy, prenatal appointment

Here's a quick update concerning my sister's surrogacy:
My sister got her first Beta done on Thursday and her HcG was 100. They were happy with that because it was so early on....they would have been relieved just to have a 50. Her progesterone level was 27. A couple days ago, her HcG was only up to 173 and her progesterone was down to 21. They were a little concerned with these numbers, so they increased the amount of progesterone suppositories she's supposed to take. The bio-mom was super nervous that this wouldn't turn out to be a viable pregnancy..... but today, my sister's HcG went up to a whopping 554! And her progesterone was at 80. They told her to cut back on the progesterone and she goes back on Thursday for yet another Beta. After she hits 1500, they will do an ultrasound to see the sac placement. She sounded very relieved when I talked to her today.....as, I'm sure the momma is too!

I'm glad I don't have to ride a scary rollercoaster like that. I mean, I haven't had anything done in the way of HcG levels or any of that stuff. I just choose not to worry about it and trust that the little bean is growing fine in my belly. (Actually he should be a little smaller than a kumquat by now!) There have been a few times when my nausea has subsided and my boobs didn't seem as sore and I got needlessly concerned....but I just know that this baby will be healthy and strong.

We have our 2nd prenatal appointment tomorrow and I am very excited. I've been trying to think of questions for the midwife to write down and take with us. I know it's early to be thinking of this, but I think I'm going to ask her what happens if I do test positive for Type B Strep later in the pregnancy. I have heard that a lot of women test positive for it and then they have to be on IV antibiotics when they deliver....but since I won't be in the hospital and I'm not all that crazy about antibiotics anyway, I wonder what the game plan would be if it would turn out positive. My midwife seems to think that Type B Strep has its roots in large livestock and that women may actually get it from dairy products. I haven't done any research on that, but I do still eat dairy. I eat string cheese occasionally and sometimes I drink goat's milk....but I haven't been eating any yogurt or cottage cheese or anything like that....although I know that acidophilis is good for you. I get so confused because my midwife is a vegan, so she is naturally going to steer me towards an animal-product free diet.....but I have no intentions of becoming a vegan, so maybe I need to make it plain to her that I need more dietary suggestions that jive with being a carnivore. (although I'm not exactly crazy about meat right now, anyway)

Labels: family, pregnancy, prenatal appointment, surrogacy

My mom and my step-dad are coming to visit for week and they are getting here on Saturday. Woohoo! I'm really excited. They live over 900 miles away near my hometown. It's probably been about 4 years since my mom has come down to see us and my step-dad has never been. My real dad and his wife have also never come down here to visit. Gees! We've gone back up to my hometown several times since I've lived here, but seems like no one ever comes down to see us. Hhhmph! Oh well, they're coming now, so that's good enough.

DH and I have soooooooooo much to do before they get here. Here is my list:

- REALLY scrub the bathroom good.

- Rearrange our bedroom to make space for the entertainment armoir they are bringing to us.

- Think of somewhat of a menu plan and snacks they might like and then go shopping. Ick.

- Mow the ditches beside our yard.

- Clean patio chairs and sweep gazebo floor (unfortunately, my mom is a smoker, and will need a place to smoke. Ick again.)

- Sweep and mop kitchen floor (and just make sure the kitchen is fairly clean in general)

- Rearrange the boxes in future baby's room to make space for the crib my parents are bringing us.

- Tidy-up the computer/media room. I wouldn't really mind the mess so much, but we entertain a lot in that room and it's sort of embarrassing. Oh my gosh....look at DH's desk....I mean, computer tech lab. Poor guy needs a workshop or something.




- Move hide-a-bed couch a foot or 2 back in media room so we have plenty of space to fold it out for us to sleep on.

- Wash and put away ALL laundry. (I have 2 overflowing baskets of clean socks, underwear, towels, and sheets that have been sitting in the laundry room for 2 months. I just keep adding to them. Whatever doesn't need to be wrinkle-free gets slung in those baskets. DH and I are getting tired of having to dig for matching socks, but I HATE putting away stuff like that.)

- Tidy up the garage a little. Garages are supposed to be messy, so I'm not too concerned about this one....just mainly get rid of boxes and other trash that are in the way.

AND.....I'll try to do these things on Saturday morning right before they get here:

- Vacuum entire house (inlcuding furniture)
- Wash and change our bedding so they have fresh sheets to sleep on
- Dust all furniture


Yikes! I feel overwhelmed....but I'm thankful that DH has the next 2 weeks off work, so he can help me do a lot of the stuff on the list before my parents get here. Oh yeah, BTW, DH got a new job! It's something that he really loves to do and he's really excited about it!

My mom is a total NEAT FREAK. Everything has to be in its place at ALL times at her house. It always looks so nice and clean.....so I feel extra pressure to tidy up our cluttery house before Saturday.

Labels: family, household chores

I've decided that anything I say about babysitting from now on is going to be POSITIVE. Seriously. I know that blogs are great for venting.....especially when you know that none of your friends and family are reading it....but I also know that the Word of God says that life and death are in the power of the tongue. (somewhere in James, maybe?) AND Proverbs 29:11 says that "A fool vents all of his feelings, but a wise man holds them back".

Me complaining about babysitting just makes the situation worse. Honestly, I should just relax and talk myself into enjoying it. I am blessed to have this extra income and also to be gaining some experience with a small child. I've turned a blessing into a curse with my bad attitude and whining. Time to change that.

Don't you just love it when a sermon convicts your heart and makes you feel like an egg-sucking dog?

Does this mean that I won't be posting about ridiculous uninvited parenting advice that my mother-in-law shares with me? Nope, probably not. Because the things she says sometimes are just silly and don't really make me mad as much as it gives me a good laugh....even though I will be sharing it in a seemingly mean-spirited tongue-in-cheek sort of way. Hope no one does a sermon on that anytime soon. ;)

I got my hair cut SHORT yesterday. I want to get rid of the black hair dye and go back to my natural color (light brownish), but do not want to use any chemicals to do so. This way, in just 3 or 4 more hair cuts, all the black will probably be gone...and honestly, I like having my hair short. I'm about to go to bed because it's late, so my eyes are all puffy and red in the pic. Nice. My husband said he really likes my haircut, too. And I know that's the truth because we are usually unabashedly honest when it comes to voicing our opinions to eachother about hair-do's and clothing and whatnot. He knows that I'm not too down with his 'fro (yes, white boy had his hair permed into an afro twice)......although it wasn't really that bad, just not my favorite. And I know that he doesn't like it when I have long or medium length hair with super-duper short bangs. I dunno, I'm a nerd, and I like having 50's short jaggedy bangs. With my nice new boy-cut, I can have them and they're not really considered bangs, I guess.

Labels: babysitting, hair, spirituality

I think I really sounded like a heartless ogre in my last post, but it was mostly just written out of heat-of-the-moment frustration, and probably isn't an accurate reflection of how I feel most of the time. I made it sound like there is something wrong with letting your child sleep with you at all times and breastfeeding on demand on an extended basis. That is certainly not how I wanted it to sound.

I am totally FOR those things. I'm glad that this child is benefitting from that close and loving style of parenting. BUT from the selfish perspective of the person who has the child 4 days a week from 7am to 5pm, golly, it makes my job so hard. The thing is, I plan on breastfeeding, babywearing, cloth diapering, and co-sleeping with my little one, so I can't be upset with someone that has chosen some of those things for their own child. I just think that full-time babysitters of "attached" children have it kind of rough.....it seems an unnatural thing to mix attachment parenting with 2 parents that work full time, and I'm feeling the brunt of that right now......but it's what I've chosen to do, and I get paid for it, so I guess I have no right to gripe. Danielle had some good advice and said that I just need to think of how I would want my child to be treated if I had to go to work and do the best I can to love and enjoy spending time with him. That is certainly something that I need to make an effort to do, because right now, I am getting a little burnt out.

I've already started getting advice from my MIL that I should transfer my baby from the bassinet in our room (and I'm sure she doesn't know it's a co-sleeper bassinet either) to his/her own crib in the nursery at 2 weeks old! Are you stinking kidding me? No way. I know that my mom has a similar philosophy, but not quite as harsh. My MIL also thinks that breastfeeding past a year is extreme and is a bad idea. I completely disagree with that as well. I am a proponent of certain aspects of attachment parenting, although my last post didn't really reflect that.

**ETA**
Oh yes, and I must add this: It is sort of sad to say, but if I start babysitting again sometime after our own child is born, I will probably choose to watch children who have been raised like my sister's children. My 16 month old nephew tugs at my sister's pant leg and points to the stairs when it's nap time because he is used to being taken upstairs to his crib and laid down to nap by himself at about the same time every day. He lays down and goes right to sleep without a fuss. All her children were bottle-fed and were cared for by their dad and grandma quite a bit while mommy was at work. They didn't throw a huge fit during feeding time or nap time when my mom was babysitting them because they were used to having someone other than mommy taking care of them some of the time. This is NOT exactly how I want to raise my own children, but I admit that these ARE the type of children that I would LOVE to babysit.

Labels: baby sleep, babysitting, general complaining

The best part of my week is Thursday evening, when the little boy I watch gets picked up. It means 3 whole days without him. I know, I'm awful.

I made a comment joking around about how I was glad when his momma came and picked him up today when I was IM'ing my MIL. She joked back, "Just think, unless you can find someone to pick your child up every weekend, yours won't 'go home'!"

I just know in my heart that I won't feel this way with my own. Most of my frustration seems to stem from how I feel about some of his mom and dad's parenting choices, not the child himself. I think it must be really confusing for a child to be able to nurse on demand all the time and then while mommy's at work, suddenly there's no nursing. Three full days pass in between mommy's work weeks, so I wonder if every Monday is just as stressful for him as the last. (I'm not sure how their memories work at 15 months) It must be frustrating for him when he is used to sleeping with mommy every night and for every nap from Friday to Sunday and then at my house, there are just times when I can't lay down with him.....so it inevitably cuts the nap short and he gets way cranky. This next one is rude, but I'm just going to say it: It must be confusing for him when, at home he can walk around the house, smear food on furniture, touch things and climb on things that are dangerous, and destroy just about anything he wants because frankly, their house is a sty......But here, I'm a little more conscious of how he treats the furniture and objects that are not for kids to play with and I'm not afraid to sternly tell him "no". I am no "neat freak" by any sense of the word, but I don't think it's too early to teach him how to respect things and know what is okay to touch and not okay to touch.

I'm not saying that I am against extended breastfeeding and co-sleeping. I'm saying that I think in an ideal situation, a woman who practices an attached style of parenting like that would benefit herself AND her child by STAYING HOME FROM WORK. I am speaking selfishly, from the babysitter's perspective, here. It's like having one foot in today's fast pace, both-parents-working type society and then the other foot in the realm of child-is-at-mommy's-breast-all-day.

Can the two mix? Just from my experience with babysitting this little one, no they can't. Or they can, but the babysitter will have nervous breakdown and the child will suffer from some serious attachment anxiety.

I'm sure most of this post is just coming from the fact that he had a rough day today and my nerves are a little frazzled. I bet I'll come back and read it and think I'm being unreasonable.

***ETA***
Oh, BTW, I am spoiled and do have the opportunity to stay home with my child, so it was probably unfair to say some of the things that I said. I know that all women can't stay home (and then there are some that WON'T, but that's another issue in of itself), but I guess it is my opinion that if you know you are going to work and leave your child with a sitter, you might want to adapt your parenting style accordingly. Peace.

Labels: babysitting, general complaining

Oh yeah, I threw my husband a surprise party yesterday for his birthday. Well, it was sort of a surprise....he came home early and saw the decorations, so I ended up telling him that I invited some people to come over later. He was still surprised, though :) My friend made the Pac-Man cake and it turned out really well. DH had a Pac-Man cake for his 5th birthday and was feeling nostalgic about it. He had asked his mom for a pic of it so we could take it to a bakery and have it re-made. Well, his mom never found the picture, but I found a pic on the internet that matched his description of the cake. He loved it!


DH and his pal having fun with b-day hats....

Our dog begging a guest for mozarella sticks and taquitos.....



Like how I blacked out DH's name? Sneaky, I know.

Labels: birthdays, dh

Some more background on my sister's surrogacy experience....
After she had her third child, she had her tubes tied because she and her husband decided that their family was complete. I'm not sure what brought the idea of being a surrogate to her mind, but back when she started mentioning it to her husband, they were in big financial trouble. At first, I think it was an idea to make a large amount of money in one fell swoop. At first, her husband was not very supportive, but she talked him into it. She went through an agency at first, but didn't like the way that turned out. All the couples they would match her up with required the surrogate to be willing to terminate for multiples and fetuses with mental or physical defects. Even though my sister was not serving the Lord at that time, she knew that she would not be willing to terminate under any circumstance and gave up on the idea of being a surrogate. She took her name off of that particular agency list, but always felt in her heart that she wanted to carry a baby for a couple that could not have children of their own.

Somewhere along the way, she rededicated her life to God and her husband got saved. They are now raising their children in church and have a strong zeal for learning about Christ. My sister was still visiting surrogacy message boards and reading a lot about the subject even after she had given up on the idea. She felt that it was her purpose in life to GIVE life. She had 3 relatively easy pregnancies and births and felt that God gave her a body that happens to be a hospitable environment for little growing lives for a reason. She met a lady on one of the message boards that shares in her beliefs about "termination" and they started e-mailing eachother. Turns out that this lady and her husband have 4 children from other surrogate pregnancies and they had 4 embryos left over from those transfers. Because they recognize those embryos as being LIVES, they felt wrong about just keeping them frozen in a bank, never giving them a chance to survive. Even though by today's standards, they already have a large family, they felt that it was incomplete and they should try to find another surrogate.

My sister and her husband have developed a relationship with this family and feel very strongly about helping them. You can imagine that after having 4 children through 3 surrogate pregnancies, these people have spent A LOT of money. They don't have much money to compensate my sister, so my sister offered to do it for practically nothing. They are, of course, paying for all medical expenses, travelling, maternity clothes, and childcare that my sister needs throughout the pregnancy. They will also compensate her for any time she has to take off work as a result of the pregnancy. It was all written up in a contract.

My family is less than supportive of this endeavor for obvious reasons. They care about my sister and don't want to see anyone take advantage of her. I honestly don't think that the family she is helping has set out to take advantage of her kind and generous heart, but it is still very easy to remain sceptical. I support her decision and understand why she has chosen to do this, but I admit that I wish she were being compensated more monetarily.

I know this is a totally different situation, but one time I offered to babysit the toddler of an acquaintance because she was down-and-out, with no job and no husband. Her son's father was not in the picture and she was having trouble job hunting being a single mom with little help from her family. Our agreement was that I would watch him for free while she searched for a job and then when she got hired someplace and could afford to pay me, she would. Long story short, she spent a couple months "looking" for a job and leaving me with her child 2 days a week or so. I'm not sure if she was being too picky or what, but it got to the point where I just felt I was being taken advantage of. I ended up telling her that I needed to get a paying job and couldn't go on waiting for her to find the perfect job. My point is, when you offer to do something as demanding as caring for another person's child for free, when it gets difficult...the kiddo is acting up, you get stuck in traffic on your way to HER apartment, momma comes home later than she said she would, etc.....it's really easy to get bitter and start hating what you're doing. Even if you started out doing it with the idea that you don't mind not getting paid, the difficult days are going to wear thin on you really fast because there's little or no reward for your hard work.

I hope that my sister does not end up feeling this way when things get tough and she is waddling around with twins or triplets or (gulp) quadruplets??? in her belly, trying to take care of her own family. Even if it ends up being a singleton, I imagine that there will be days when it would've helped to be able to envision that $25,000-$40,000 (that's how much she would've gotten if she would've gone through the agency) coming her way after the baby is delivered. I know she doesn't care about the lack of payment right now, but I hope it doesn't make her bitter later.

Labels: family, surrogacy

Well, it looks like my sister is pregnant too! She is really excited....but this is not an ordinary pregnancy, per se....she is a surrogate for a couple who lives 1,000 miles away from her. She has gotten 2 faint positives and it is 9 days post-transfer. My family is not extremely supportive of her decision to do this, but I'm glad she's not letting that stop her. I think as long as her husband is okay with it and she feels like it is God's plan for her life, she should go for it....and she has! There's a good chance she is preggy w/ multiples, since they implanted 4 embryos. I'm not sure what the chances of all 4 embryos surviving is, but I know that twins are a definite possibility. She is doing this surrogacy practically for free because she feels deep in her heart that this is what she is meant to do. I admire her selflessness. I hope that her children, who are 5, 3, and 15 months are not negatively affected by all of this....but I'm sure that my sister has already thought and prayed about that. They are too young to really grasp what it means for mommy to carry someone else's baby, I think....but I hope it doesn't confuse them too much.

Labels: family, surrogacy

I was tagged by Sorlil
Here's an interesting meme:
Instructions: Grab the book closest to you.
Open to page 123.
Scroll down to the 5th sentence.
Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog - name of the book and the author.
Then tag 3 people.

Well, it's no surprise that the book in closest proximity to me is The Pregnancy Book by Dr. William Sears M.D. and Martha Sears, R.N. I find it funny that page 123 happens to focus on sexuality during pregnancy.

Now that you're pregnant, you may start wondering, "What will it take to make me feel and act sexy?" Your biological destiny is on the threshold of the ultimate expression of female sexuality - birth and nurturing. Being pregnant, after all, is the incontrovertible proof of your sex appeal.

Very interesting. I've never thought if it that way, but I guess it makes sense.....although "sexy" is not a word I would use to describe how I'm feeling right now. I'm looking forward to the 2nd trimester, when the books and websites say I will have more energy and a higher sex drive. I guess it's not that my sex drive is low right now....it's that I'm perpetually nauseated and puking is not very sexy.

Also, and this is sort of off subject, but I recently stopped shaving my legs. It's not the first time I have gone on razor strike. There is something very liberating about being able to shower without having to take the time and effort shaving my underarms and legs. My husband claims that he doesn't mind it at all. I want to believe him, but I look down at my chubby white legs, covered in DARK coarse hair, and it turns me off! :) I hate that I just can't think my legs are nice the way they are and that society has successfully conditioned me to believe that smooth hairless legs = femininity. The pits don't bother me as much....it's just the legs. I'd like to be able to wear skirts and capri pants, but I can't help but be embarrassed by my hairy hobbit legs. I had slacks on at church the other day, and when I crossed my legs I looked down and saw the super long dark hairs on my exposed ankle and it made me shudder.....and then I hoped nervously that no one else noticed. I hate shaving, but I also hate being so self conscious about showing even an inch of my legs. Maybe I just need to get over the embarrassment and go on. If my husband isn't grossed out by my man-hair, I guess I shouldn't be either.

Oh yeah, I'm supposed to tag 3 of you to do the book thing, but I'm too lazy. Tag yourself if you wanna. ;)

Labels: me-me

My cousin who got pregnant shortly after I did ended up having a miscarriage this week. My heart just breaks for her. Her pregnancy was unplanned with a man she is not married to yet, but it was to be her first baby and they were both so ecstatic about it. I was really happy for her too. Uuughh....I just can't imagine how she must be feeling right now. When she went to the doctor, they were having trouble pin-pointing her dates because she has really irregular cycles, so they did an ultrasound. They had trouble finding the sac at first, but it was there. They estimated that she was about 6 weeks along. She went back a few days after that for another ultrasound, since they didn't get a great look at it before. At that ultrasound, they said that the baby's heartbeat was lower than what it should be. I have no experience at all with this. We haven't even heard or "seen" our babe's heartbeat yet, so I'm not sure what the heartbeat should be at that stage. They told her to come back to have another ultrasound a few days after that, and they found that the heartbeat was gone. The doctor gave her a pill to "pass" the baby and some pretty hefty pain medicine for the impending cramps. She took the pill and the sac w/ the baby inside was passed the next day. That in itself had to be a horrific experience.

What an awful thing to have happen. I have never suffered the pain of a miscarriage and I can't even imagine what it would be like. I can't say what I'd do in that situation, but I think I might be too scared to take whatever pill they gave her to make the uterus contract. I would be in denial and assume that the doctor had no idea what he/she was talking about and then wait for my body's own signals. My cousin said she was having nausea and had tender veiny breasts. Her symptoms still seemed to be in full force. If it were me, I'd have a really difficult time believing the doctor and wait for the bleeding to commence itself instead of taking that pill. But then again, maybe that's not always a possibility, since some women do have to get a D&C done after miscarriage. That's something I definitely know nothing about, but my general distrust and scepticism concerning doctors would be enough for me to let nature run its course instead of helping things along with a pill. But like I said, I know nothing of the subject, so maybe she did the very best thing. I don't know.

I feel blessed to have this healthy little creature thriving inside of me, and so sad that my cousin will not get to feel that baby grow and bring it into this world. Tomorrow will be 9 weeks since my LMP date. Our next appointment with the midwife is September 19th. Woohoo! I will be 10 weeks along at that point.

I've felt EXTREMELY nauseous all day, but I really can't complain about it. I am thankful for the tiny baby taking shape inside me and the surge of hormones that is making feel so ill is also causing my baby's cells to form and multiply into a healthy and complete body. I'm just very concerned with how I've been eating. I had my first little bit of salad in a long time today and it was very difficult to chew up and swallow. The texture and smell just gets to me. All I want are high-fiber cereals, an occasional egg (and even more so if I don't have to cook it and look at its runny raw form. Ick!), any kind of beans, any kind of cheese (well, maybe not brie or anything funky like that), and potatoes (especially baked or mashed). That is about the extent of what seems palatable to me at the moment. I did eat some pizza today (no meat!!! meat totally grosses me out right now) and ended up scraping the cheese off of some of it.....so essentially, I ended up having white bread w/ tomato sauce on it. I'm continuing to take my vitamins and iron supplement.....but I'm sure the midwife is not going to be pleased with my lack of green veggies. Yikes.

Labels: pregnancy, sadness

I swear I could eat like 3 bean burritos from Taco Bell right now. Pregnancy does crazy things. When I used to go to Taco bell and order a Mexican pizza, I'd get it with NO BEANS...every time. Now, I think I'd ask them to hand me the vat of beans so I could scoop out as many beans as I wanted to shovel onto my Mexican pizza.

I started drinking Emergen-C in the morning before I eat my cereal and it seems to curb my nausea. Must be all the B vitamins in it....plus it's refreshingly fizzy. Mmmmmm.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about ultrasounds. There have been studies done on lab rats that concluded that the group of fetal rats (or mice - not sure which) that were exposed to a certain amount (I think it was pretty high) of ultrasonic waves ended up having cells in their tiny developing brains that did not move to the places they were supposed to move to. An article titled "Ultrasound Scans Linked to Brain Damage in Babies" was also a little disturbing. I think my husband and I have opted for NO ultrasound images, unless there is some overwhelming medical need for one. However, I'm pretty sure the little portable machine that the midwife used to listen for the heartbeat (unsuccessfully-it was way too early) at our last appointment is a doppler ultrasound device. So, I guess we've already exposed the bean to some ultrasonic waves. I may just be overly paranoid/cautious, whatever you want to call it. After all, the article about the mice said that there's no reason to think ultrasound waves have the same effect on human fetuses. The fetal mice were exposed to quite a high amount of ultrasound waves, compared to what the average human baby is exposed to for a continuous amount of time. AND the mice are really tiny, so there is less tissue between the ultrasound device and the fetus. I don't know. It's got me a little mixed up. On one hand, I'd rather be safe than sorry and just avoid ultrasounds altogether, just in case there ARE adverse effects that we are unaware of. On the other hand, I don't want to let a few somewhat inconclusive studies scare me into not checking for the baby's heartbeat at our next appointment. Another option would be to wait until I am closer to 20 weeks, when the heartbeat could be heard with a fetal stethoscope....but I think it's so reassuring to hear the heartbeat as soon as possible.

Labels: controversial topics, food, pregnancy, tough parenting decisions

I think I am going to make this tonight:

Jalapeno Corn Bread

2 cups cream corn
2/3 cup vegetable oil
2 cups sour cream
1 1/2 to 2 cups shredded cheddar cheese
1 4oz can of jalapenos or green chilies, seeded and chopped
2 cups corn bread mix
4 eggs, beaten
1 cup chopped onion

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease 13x9x2 inch pan. Combine corn, corn bread mix, oil, eggs, sour cream, cheese, onion, and jalapenos. Pour into pan. Bake about 1 hour @ 350 degrees. Recipe can easily be halved.

I got this recipe from Cooks.com, but I'm pretty sure it's the exact same recipe that my friend used to make this delicious cornbread that you can almost make a meal out of. I will have to leave out the sour cream, because my husband HATES sour cream with a passion. And trust me - he will be able to tell that I used sour cream. He can sense it, even if he can't quite taste it. I have some brown & red beans simmering in the crock pot right now. Maybe I'll have a few friends over to help us eat all of it, since I made WAY too many beans.

****ETA****
Oops - I had originally typed "2 CANS of cream corn", when it should've been CUPS. Doh! Well, good thing I realized that before I made it....but then I actually did end up using 2 cans, because I needed to substitute for the sour cream I left out.

Labels: food, recipes

toward an all-carb diet. I was illin' all day long. We didn't end up going to our friends' house for breakfast because one of them got called into work. It was probably better that we didn't go over there while I was feeling so puky. I was able to stomach a bowl of Kashi cereal (which happens to have 13 grams of protein per serving, so that's good), and a bowl of scrambled eggs w/ a little bit of cheddar cheese in them. Oh man, it was hard to cook and swallow those eggs. That was all until about 7 pm, when DH and I went to a local craft fair to see our pals' grandkids squaredance. Yes, you heard correctly - SQUAREDANCE. (Yeah, people are pretty down-home country 'round these parts) Anyway, there was a booth selling food near the squaredancing stage and they had beans and cornbread. I was getting over my nausea, as I usually do in the evenings, so a big bowl of home-cooked nourishment sounded mighty fine to me. I also had a piece of peanutbutter cake from the same booth.

We went to our pals' house after the squaredancing was over and the lady of the house made us French toast and sausage. She also made a giant chocolate chip cookie with cream cheese frosting and fruit on top. I refrained from the sausage, but did eat 3 pieces of french toast w/ syrup (and it wasn't natural maple syrup - it was maple flavored syrup-like product) and a couple bites of the cookie concoction. Oh, and I had a tall glass of 2% milk as well.

My midwife would not have been pleased had she been around today to witness my slow decline into the pits of junk-food. I don't feel good about what I ate, but lately bready/cakey/cerealy items are the only things I can eat without a strong gag reflex taking over as my stomach turns and my mouth gets watery. The thought of chicken in any form sickens me at the moment. Beef almost sounds as repulsive, but I could probably handle it pot roast form w/ potatoes and carrots.

I may have to live on beans and cereal for a while until my tummy calms down. I know it wouldn't be a very rounded diet, but at least it would be healthier than eating cake and french toast in the evenings when I'm not so nauseous.

Labels: food, pregnancy, pregnancy whining

My sweet husband took me out for Thai food last night. I was a little nervous once we got to the restaurant that I'd get my plate in front of me and wouldn't be able to eat it.....the restaurant just had that overbearing asian restaurant smell, which was thoroughly unappealing to me. My fears were unfounded. The food tasted great to me and I ate ALOT of it. I bet it was a little bit difficult for DH to believe that I had been sick on the couch all day, unable to eat anything, after seeing me shovel noodles in like that! I drank Sprite w/ my meal, which also tasted delicious to me, since we only stock water in our fridge and the sweet fizziness felt good on my belly.

And now....I'm nauseous again. We're going to some friends' house for breakfast this morning and I hope they aren't offended if I lay on the couch and only pick at the food they've prepared. They're true pals, so I'm sure they'll understand. Usually, they make eggs and oatmeal when we come over and I think I just may be able to stomach those two things....but then I haven't smelled it cooking yet.

Labels: food, pregnancy, pregnancy whining

Geez, am I nauseous! I don't even like going in my kitchen lately. Too many strong odors that I wouldn't normally notice....opening the refrigerator, getting near the trash can, looking @ dirty dishes w/ food residue in the kitchen sink....oh my...not even fun thinking about it.

My friend, whose due date is 6 days before mine, says she is battling nausea too. She normally has a very healthy lifestyle and eats nutritious foods every day, but she said that the only things that sound appealing to her are really junky processed foods like Spaghetti-O's and corn dogs. While I haven't craved those exact things, I haven't been able to bring myself to eat any vegetables for the past day and a half. I took one bite of salad yesterday and didn't even think I was going to be able to swallow it. Starches sound fantastic to me. A giant bowl of some kind of spicy noodles would be great. Please, husband....if you're reading this, take me out for Thai food today or tomorrow. I beg you. I know it's not very healthy, but it's the only thing that doesn't make me want to barf. I didn't think I'd be playing the crazy-pregnant-lady-craving card so early in the game, but it's almost uncontrollable. It's not really that I'm "craving" it....it's that I need food and all other food makes me gag.

Labels: pregnancy, pregnancy whining