My husband said that I must've gotten the wrong idea about how he feels about cloth diapering. He's still on board with it....he just figured it would be good to present other people's arguments to me to see if I had thought things through enough to have legitimate rebuttles to their "concerns" about using cloth. That's good. I thought he was sort of getting cold feet, but turns out he still thinks it's a good plan. Also, it freaked him out a little when I initially figured how much money we'd need to get started on cloth diapering. I was making a wish list of all kinds of fancy new-fangled diapers: Fuzzi Bunz, Bumgenius one-size pocket diapers, Kissaluvs fitteds, and a couple of washable diaper pail liners. All those things made for a very expensive wish list! While I'd like to try all of these products at some point during our cloth diapering journey, I feel relieved to know that I don't have to stock up on all the fancy stuff right now to have a sufficient diaper stash. DH is relieved to know that I can get everything we need to start out for $100. The only things I'll need to buy on top of that cost is fleece fabric to cut up for diaper liners (thanks, Danielle, for suggesting that!) and some wool wash & lanolin for the wool covers I already have. DH had a good point: we have a history of jumping head-first into ideas without totally thinking them through. He just wants to make sure this isn't one of them....because that could be expensive. This way, if for any reason we'd decide that cloth diapering is not for us, we won't be losing a ton of money. I really do have a great feeling about it, though....especially after getting enouragement from Danielle and Rebekah. I seriously doubt that we'll try it and decide we can't do it.

THIS IS WHAT I ALREADY HAVE:

- 3 Baby Greens "Growing Greens" One-size hemp diapers (even thought these are "one-size", they just look so huge. It might be a little bit until I can use these.)
- 3 Disana Wool Covers (1 small, 1 med, 1 lrg)
- 2 Bum-Ware AIO's w/ doublers
- Material to make about 3 or 4 size small homemade AI2's w/ snap-in soaker. (My friend hired me to make a bunch for her and told me to keep some of the fabric to make some for myelf. Woohoo!)
- 5 homemade contour-shaped doublers made from flannel and unbleached terry.
- 2 infant size prefolds
- 2 size small Bummi's Super Whisper Wraps


THIS IS WHAT I'M GOING TO BUY (from Integrity Diapers):

- 3 dozen infant size Chinese Prefolds
- 5 size small ProWrap covers
- 4 Snappi diaper fasteners
- 8 pair of Dritz diaper pins

Okay, on to things that are way more important than poop-catchers.....

I was reading bits and pieces of Isaiah last night and this scripture really jumped out at me:

Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the LORD, The Creator of the ends of the earth, Neither faints nor is weary. His understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the weak, And to those who have no might He increases strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall, But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. -Isaiah 40:28-31

That promise gives me hope because sometimes I feel so weak. Not like, "Oh whoa is me, my life is so tough!" type of weak.....but more like an "I'm tired of letting God down and allowing my laziness prevent me from fulfilling my purpose." kind of weak. Sometimes I find that I'm going to church and singing out of HABIT. The zeal and love that I originally had for the Lord when I first gave Him my heart has faded and I fear that I more resemble the scribes & Pharisees that disgusted Jesus than I resemble a TRUE follower of Christ who has a deep relationship with Him. That makes me so sad.

I really think I'm getting on the right track, though. My desire to read His Word and get to know His heart is growing and I'm realizing that I can't live a luke-warm life anymore. Life without a true relationship with Christ (meaning, talking to Him, listening to Him, thinking about Him all the time, singing to Him, being filled with His joy and delighting in His Word) is meaningless and eventually crumbles into pieces. I'm sick of "playing church" and going through the motions. The funny thing is, I go to a wonderful church where the preaching is powerful and challenging....it's not like I'm not being fed.... my heart just isn't listening and I'm not applying anything I learn. Well, I don't want my life to be like that anymore.

Labels: cloth diapering, spirituality