Making a Person: Mowing with Papoose

Whew. Just mowed our huge yard w/ a pushmower. I would love to just get pizza instead of making dinner because I am worn out. I know I must be ready to have a baby because every mundane everyday task, every t.v. show, everything in my house brings the fact that we'll (hopefully) be parents within a year to my mind.

While I was mowing, I thought about how I would go about doing it when I have a small infant. I imagined myself with a little baby riding on my back in a sling or carrier of sorts while I do the yardwork, cook dinner on the grill, and take a walk to the post office.

I have a pattern to make a sling like this one:

Seems like it would be very handy indeed.
Something like this would be very useful, but it's a little pricey at 90-something dollars or so:

The Ergo Baby Carrier

Everything I do on a daily basis will change forever, and I'm ready for that.

I just started babysitting a 1 year old little boy last week. He is challenging yet so precious and loving. The challenging part is that he constantly wants to be held and he is HEAVY. I probably need to go ahead and make that sling so I can tote him around the house with me. He screamed incessantly this afternoon....even when I would hold him. His momma still breastfeeds him, so I know that's what he was wanting. Sorry, bud...can't help you out there. Poor little guy. I know he was just exhausted.

I'm under the impression that his momma hold him all the time and doesn't let him cry. Which, I'm not saying there is or isn't anything wrong with that, but without momma's boob to comfort him he can be pretty hard to deal with.

I have mixed feelings about letting a child "cry it out"....meaning, to let the child cry him/herself to sleep in a room by themselves rather than picking them up and rocking and comforting them. Many childcare experts from the 50's until the present have been proponents of this philosophy. But there are others, called "Attachment Parents" that believe it is never okay to let a baby "cry it out". These parents adopt the use of a sling or carrier and constantly hold their infants. I'm very confused about which would be better, but I suppose it would just depend on the child.

Today I let the little guy cry in his playpen for a little while because he was impossible to soothe. I tried everything and I knew that he just needed a nap. I felt so horrible after hearing him scream and cry for about 5-10 minutes, I broke down and held him. It felt strange and wrong to let him scream.

Labels: babysitting, babywearing, controversial topics

1 Comments:

Heidi said...: Woo hoo! Another issue to comment on!

From what I understand, and I'm no real expert here, babies are born into this world thinking that we are an extension of them. They don't exit the womb with the realization that they are a separate entity. Over time, they obviously learn the idea of individuality. To use someone else's term, "babies are social creatures" and used to being constantly craddled in the womb, and birth is a real shock to their system.

When my son was born, I could not bring myself to let him cry it out. Again, no expert, but it seems that there is little debate that a child under the age of 6 months can learn anything from this method...they do not yet posess the ability to self sooth. However, once a child does reach 6 months, they will begin to have the tools available to them to begin to learn the process. And because they are starting from the very beginning, they also need to learn that just because you leave their sight for a moment that you are not gone forever. (This one is a biggie throughout the first year, and even beyond.) It seems strange to us adults, but it really is the younger verison of irrational fears that they hold onto so strongly and cannot overcome. Another prime example: a toddler who is convinced that the toilet, if flushed in their presence, will take him or her along with the waste.

With my own son, I could not bear to let him cry. My husband, however, had a much easier time of letting go. (Hormones or lack thereof, IMHO.) But at 8 months old, I had to give crying it out a try. He was still getting up every 60-90 minutes, feeding for 30-45 minutes, and then repeating the whole pattern again and again all through the night. It was killing me, and because I was breast feeding and he didn't like bottles, I was the only one who could sooth him. I had to do it for me, because my lack of sleep was not only affecting me, but my ability to care for him. As for crying it out, something I swore I'd never do, it worked for us. I knew how long he could go between feedings, and after one hard night he was fine. And he's still fine. I wish I hadn't had to do it, and I know there people out there who make it without doing it I applaud them. But on this one I had to cave as much as my heart didn't want to.

Even with all the wonder gadgets available to us today, it can be impossible to take a shower or go to the bathroom wearing a sling. LOL So try as you might, you can't always be there every single moment. With the child you described, my guess would be that his own mother does occasionally put him down. She must! But it doesn't mean that the desire to be held constantly is any less powerful. My own son, even though he wanted to be held 24/7 (which I did for a long time) hated ALL slings. Boy oh boy did I have some great arm muscles!

Welcome to the world of your own needs almost never coming first. Occasionally they do, but not as often as you'd think. And it's so totally worth it! =); Sun Jul 09, 03:01:00 AM CDT